In my more than 50 years of ministry as a local church pastor member of the leadership team for four consecutive district superintendents, I have often been shocked, and surprised but always saddened when a fellow pastor suffers a moral failure. A common element in almost every crash is isolation from meaningful, candid, and transparent relationships with others. Carey Nieuwhof wisely observes,
Solitude is a gift from God. Isolation is not—it’s a tool of the Enemy.
—Carey Nieuwhof 1
The last few years have been extremely and stressful personally for me for a number of reasons: First, Carolyn and I became full-time care givers for my aging mother for the last several months of her life; second, I was asked to leave the church revitalization, pastor encouragement, and resource role I loved to and assume an administrative position to help the District Superintendent develop a much-needed minister care system for our network of 1,100 ministers; finally, in addition to the care-giving, and system-creating administrative responsibilities, I’ve began an aggressive pursuit of a Doctor of Ministry degree, and have made a late-life career change into Bible college and university teaching.
I can sincerely say that my mutual encouragement and accountability partnership with my dear friend, Dr. Tedd Manning has been an encouraging and profoundly meaningful blessing. Tedd and I have candidly and transparently shared the “deep water” of life and ministry for the last couple of years. It is amazing how cathartic and stress-reliving it is to share with a trusted and caring friend.
I repeat—don’t do ministry (or life) alone—find a trusted friend who can be an encouragement and accountability partner.
1 Nieuwhof, Carey. Didn’t See It Coming (p. 65). The Crown Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.